I was so blind
For 4 years I’ve behaved like a normal person
Looked for the silver lining and usually found it
I’ve found joy
I’ve found Companionship
I’ve found Love, happiness acceptance, bliss, fearlessness
Until this day…
I have pretended nothing ever happened.
I tried to forget
I tried to forgive…no small feat.
Now I must face up to what’s about to happen.
Our own evil will once again be free.
My fear is inexplicable
I can’t spell it, draw it or voice it.
I am so afraid.
I want him to have changed.
I want him to have given up on us.
I want him to not blame us.
I want him to leave ALL of us alone.
I want him to realize HIS errors
And never repeat them.
I just want to never see his face again.
I want to eventually behave like a normal person.
I want to not fear who’s on the other side of the door.
I want to not worry about who’s not right in front of me.
My eyes are open again…sadly I am no longer blind.